A start and a finish

The past 2 weeks have been quiet eventful, if say the least. In fact there have been several new beginnings. The first one is that I have visited the disability center where I will be working this summer. I have also been “working” there a few days where the employees mainly have been telling me how everything works and what they do. Since I can be rather shy amongst new people the first day was a bit challenging, however after that it has been better and I will properly start working in 2 weeks from now.

The thing that have ended is my education, about a week ago I graduated secondary school. For me this is a fairly big achievement, especially since I was told about 2 months ago that I might not. Yet I pulled through with alright grades and I could run out from the school building alongside my friends. Then jump around, dancing and screaming on a truck’s platform going around town, which is a tradition here in Sweden when you graduate. After a few hours I got home and had some food and was celebrated for finishing school before me and my friends hit the town to party. Together with hundreds of other graduates we went to a large hotel that has a night club where we had a few drinks and danced until the early hours of the next day. For not being a fan of partying I actually had fun, it was probably a mixture of alcohol, the atmosphere and the happiness from graduating. Anyhow, I actually had a good time. The thing I will miss about the school I went to is the psychiatrist. She has helped me to understand myself and my depression during the last 2 years and for that I will be forever grateful. I feel like I owe her so much and that is why I am actually a bit sad about leaving. However she said that if I ever have my ways around town after I have moved she would be very happy to see me, and I will be delighted to meet her again.

On to the other two beginnings. During the last 1-2 years I have been aware about the fact that I have an eating disorder. I have not been wanting to write about it since the subject is rather sensitive to me, but the thing I wanted to bring forward is that I have started getting help for it and within a near future I will begin a proper treatment and get medicin for it. The last new beginning was chocking since it happened so quickly. I was at a facility this week to talk about my eating disorder to settle which treatment would be best. Now the doctor I saw is also a psychiatrist and she was curious about my depression since at times these two things walk hand in hand. After 50 minutes of talking and filling out a form she prescribed me medicin. That same day I picked it up from a pharmacy. It has been 8 years since I fell into my depression and I have finally goten medication for it. Not only is this a huge relief but it makes me happy. The doctor also said I would get medicin for my anxiety but those will take a little longer. The downside to this though is that the pills do not properly start working until about 1-3 weeks after you start taking them and in the beginning you might also become more depressed from taking them. Which I unfortunately have felt, but since I know about it I constantly tell myself that it is the pills and not my true feelings which has helped. The important thing is that the dream of getting proper help for my depression has come true.


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